Hypatia Avenue

What? Did I grow a cock overnight and not notice? If I've got a penis now, I want to see it, and play with it. A lot.

That was me, this morning, on receiving my first bill from our new phone company and finding it addressed to Mr Hypatia Avenue.Bwah.

In other news, here's a weekend update, just because I've been slack with updating the Avenue... after a nightmare week at work which has recently turned into the ill-equipped, badly organised and stroppy-staffed frontdesk of Stress Central Inc., I managed to get away from my increasingly horrible office and the increasingly horrible launch of our new website (this Thursday! Waaaah! Dribble! Gibber! Etc!) and get out to a comedy club south of the river at which I caught up with all my post-grad mates. I think I'm the only one who will be doing the walk of shame across the stage at Guildhall come Graduation day: no one is going to it except me. Pheh, how much fun is that going to be?

Still, the evening was great, even though the comedy was not - out of the seemingly relentless and unfunny, heavily stereotyped and cliched gags about Americans, Germans, straight people and Liverpudlians, only a few things stuck in my alcohol-sodden mind as funny: a song from Luke Skywalker to Princess Leia describing how they can still be sister and brother and in love with each other - in Cornwall. Also, a long and protracted gag comparing women and men's skills with blowjobs. Hee and hee indeed.

Then there was a lot of over-excited and drunken dancing to Tony's Mobile Disco and some euphoric whooping and arse-wiggling when they played my favourite ever Stevie Wonder song for the fifth time in two hours. And then the stumbling journey home and my baffling entry into my old flat which has been recently gutted for redecoration and wondering where the fuck all the walls had gone. Managed to get into my new flat (after a lot of struggling with keys and a missing doorframe) and drifted in and out of merry consciousness in front of the TV until it was Saturday and far too late to have some water and Alka-Seltzer to save myself from a rather nasty hangover.

Despite the slightly green tinge to my morning, Saturday was niiiiiiice: shopping, cooking and unexpected but pleasant meetings on the Tube then getting thoroughly spooked watching the Signs DVD with August D. Sunday was spent doing domestic work and then getting wedding plans underway with my folks over dinner... there's a lot of work to do before we can start having fun... but oh! It's going to be fun, French-style. I'm assured that the campsite is far superior to the website and I trust LittleBigSister's taste in things like this. Well, it ain't a buffet in a Little Chef at least.

In other news, it's my birthday next weekend.

That is all. Over and out.